Search Me

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This week I have been working on teaching my students to be more proactive than reactive. I try and explain to them the importance of controlling themselves and their reactions to others. I talk to them about making sure they stop and think about what they should say and do before they act. It is funny how when you are teaching something, that seems to be an area that you begin to struggle even more.

Over the last year and a half, I have found myself wanting to react so many times. When I see people say and do things I want to give my opinion and try and get people to understand why I am right. I want to join in the reactive conversations that cause hurt and pain to others as people vehemently declare their rightness and everyone else's wrongness. I have never in my life seen a time when people are so vicious and just downright rude to each other.

It also breaks my heart when I see people try and use scriptures to back up their opinion, but use them completely out of context and therefore soil their witness for Christ. There have been several fairly known preachers that have said some truly hateful and crazy things from the pulpit recently, and in so doing have turned even more people away from Christ. 

In Matthew 5 Jesus said, “You are the light of the world—like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden.  No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house.  In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father."

He didn't say you are to be constantly putting others down and arguing- he said your deeds should shine for all to see so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father. In fact, later in the chapter, he said,  "But I say, if you are even angry with someone, you are subject to judgment! If you call someone an idiot, you are in danger of being brought before the court. And if you curse someone, you are in danger of the fires of hell."

So much of the time we are quick to think we are righteous because we think we are right and we try and shove our perceived righteousness down the throat of anyone who disagrees with us. I have to admit, I have been guilty as well. My heart breaks and I get confused at times wondering why other people see things the way they do. I tend to want to judge them for their beliefs and get upset when I think that they are not being sensible. I think I am right, so I must be righteous. I go to church, I teach the Word, I am a Christian so I must be right and anyone who disagrees must be wrong. 

But when I read what Jesus said in Matthew 5 I have to stop and realize that if I am angry with others, I am subject to judgment. If I call someone an idiot I am in danger of being called an idiot as well. Since Covid began there is a passage that has come up in me over and over as I deal with this internal fight of feeling right, and being upset when I see others that I believe are wrong.

It is found in Psalm 139:23-24, "Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life." David is praying and asking God to test him, to know his thoughts that are making him anxious, but then to point out anything in those thoughts that offend God. Walking in the path of everlasting life is more important than appearing right. So many nights in the last year and a half I go to bed and find myself with anxious thoughts, angry thoughts, frustrated thoughts and I make myself pray these verses. Lord point out anything in ME that offends you. It has become my heart's prayer and one that I have to pray often. 

In order to be proactive instead of reactive, I have to make sure that I am being sensitive to God and His thoughts, not my own. I need to be more focused on being light, than thinking I am right.

If you are a Christian and you are facing this same heartbreaking frustration over other people, I challenge you to take it to God. Ask Him to change you, before you ask Him to change them. Ask Him to help you be humble. Ask Him to remind you that even if you are right, it is more important to be a light and show people who God really is. Let's ask God to help our words to be as Colossians 4:6 says and for them to be gracious and seasoned with salt so that we may know how to answer everyone. There are times we should give our opinion. There are times we should state facts even if others don't believe them, but we must do it from a place of humility and graciousness and not from a place of reactive anger. 

Father- help us to hear your voice and be led by your Spirit. Give us words that are gracious. Give us peace as we deal with the difficulties in this season. May our lives be a witness of your light and not be something that turns people from you. Thank you for searching our hearts, leading us, and putting us on the right path.

Amen


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