Live in His Word

          I do not think of myself as a worrier. I think of myself as a planner and a fixer. Planning and fixing can be good, but there are times that they can cross over the line into the realm of worry. The thing is that worry can just kind of creep right up on you, and you don’t even realize it is coming. It is pretty sneaky like that. The other night, one of my children was dealing with something that was causing them frustration and even a bit of physical pain. This momma’s heart just wanted to rush right in and fix it for them, and I think that is normal. It isn’t wrong for me to wish I could fix things for them, but the problem came when I went to bed that night. Lying in bed I kept thinking, “if only I had done this, then this situation would be different” or “is it going to get better, what if it doesn’t get better?” I know better than this. I know that this kind of thinking doesn’t do any good, so eventually (I wish I could say ...

I did it. No matter how hard I try not to, I managed to give my email to someone that decided to share my email with others. Sharing is good and all, but not my email address. Now several times a day, I get emails that I just don’t need. Emails letting me know I can refinance my home (I don’t own a home), offering me new credit cards (which I definitely do not need) and the most interesting is perhaps the ‘Meet singles over 50’. Now this one might be tempting if it weren’t for two things. One- Despite the gray hairs that have begun to grace my head I am not over 50, for a couple of months I am not even 40 yet. Can I please just deal with one decade at a time? Two- I am very happily married, so I am not in need of meeting any available seniors right now. When I see these emails, I do not even bother opening them. You never know, some of them might even contain viruses. Now I just automatically delete them. Why? Because I don’t need them and they are a waste of my time and storage ca...

A few years ago my husband and I were going through training to plant a church, and as part of the training we had to do a spiritual gifting/personality test. I do not remember exactly what my score was on that particular test, but I do remember that in the description of my trait it said I could have a tendency to be critical of other people’s plans or ideas. This was really a shocker to me. I tend to think of myself as a sweet, kind, and non- judgmental person, so when I read that I told my husband I thought the test was way off because I didn’t think that described me at all.   I told him that I do not believe I criticize others plans or ideas. I said I don’t even have trouble following another person’s plans as long as it is not a stupid plan that is destined to fail. He immediately began laughing at me, and not just a little, and I immediately did not see the humor.                 He told...

            Last week I talked about how we can't make ourselves worthy by what we do, but we are made worthy through Christ and what he did. I think one reason we don't feel worthy is because we do not see our own worth. We do not see the value that God puts on us. It is so easy to try and get our value from people around us, but that is definitely not a safe place to get it. From the time I was in elementary school, I have always fought insecurity. Starting in about third grade, I thought maybe I had a sign on my head that said "pick on me, I am worthless", because well, so many people did. Looking back now, I realize that part of it was just kids being kids, hurting people hurt people, and sometimes it was just thoughtless words people would say. At school, I had a teacher who would humiliate me in front of my class to the point I was physically ill; it seemed like the kids thought I was an easy target after that. I don’t thi...

          Not too long ago, I was driving down the road and began praying. This particular prayer stands out to me because as I was praying I caught myself saying, “God help me to be worthy of your love.” Suddenly, as fast as I said that, I had this realization that I was wrong. I realized that what I was really asking, was for God to help me make my behavior perfect enough that He could accept me and love me more.             You see- I have always been the “good girl”. I hate- I mean really hate being in trouble or having anyone think badly of me. If there was a rule, I wanted to stay five feet this side of the line to make sure I didn’t accidentally almost think about looking at the line and risk the wrath of God or someone in authority. For some reason, I grew up thinking that God was this strict mean judge, high up in the sky waiting for me to mess up so that He could zap m...

As 2014 began I knew that it was time for me to get more focused on my writing and on different aspects of ministry.   In the past, I wrote a devotional I called the Live Free Devotional. The premise of that devotional blog started with the book I had written about living free from fear. That is still an issue close to my heart, but recently as I would go back to that blog I always felt that there was something new I needed to focus on. Over the last few weeks, I believe I have discovered that I need to focus on the choices we make.           Most people start out the year reflecting on the past year and where they were, where they are now, and where they want to be this time next year. I do that a little bit at the beginning of every new year, but I have a time that causes me to reflect even more. This past week was the 18 th anniversary of when my mother passed away and every year that anniversary causes me to reflect on my lif...